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Slowly stop going to this place where I get in this bubble and don't come out. Inside that bubble I stay. I don't come out. I keep all my secrets to myself. I don't tell anyone how I'm feeling, and I don't talk to God. I hate that bubble.
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That was the bubble I was in before I started this blog. And I will not. EVER go back into that bubble. I won't let myself. I don't want to go back to that horrible horrible place. I can't.
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As my tears stream down my face I realize that the only person who did this was me. I let myself shrivel down to nothingness. You say "Tansy didn't anyone notice". Nope, they didn't, because I'm a damn good actress. No one could have possibly known.
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I was the picture of happiness to everyone around me. If they did notice, they didn't care enough to help. I realize this now. I may have had fun in that bubble, but now its slowly starting to pop. I don't care either. I'm ready to be rid of it.
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I think this is why I'm so obsessed with falling in love, because when I find love. I won't be alone anymore. I can talk to someone about how I feel, and how they make me feel better. Thats why I want love.
Peace out Girl Scout.
The greatest thing about realizing where you are heading is just that.... now that you see it you can do a U-ey and change directions and head somewhere you want to go.
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